My husband’s job search began long before the he was laid off as president and COO of a start-up. It had been clear for many months prior to then that the likelihood of his losing his job was pretty strong. As he was still very much engaged in the daily struggle of attempting to keep his company afloat, it was difficult for him to spend much time in the job search at that time. I wasn’t working and had time to begin his search, aided by the incentive of our growing worry at his uncertain job security. Looking back, I wonder how unique our combined-effort approach was and hope that by sharing our experience I may be able to provide some useful information to others.
It now seems impossible we were once so unskilled in the job search process! The advice we received through ExecuNet was invaluable in providing clear, succinct and useful information on how to conduct an effective job search. After a 25-year career, during which time he had never had to conduct a search, my husband was woefully unprepared for the siege that lay before us. I suspect that not unlike many high-achieving executives, my husband had taken very little time during his career to develop an organized list of contacts and networks. He had been so focused on his job that he never thought about managing his career. In the “good old days” he had been called regularly by recruiters with interesting opportunities, and that was the way he came to all the roles he held throughout his career.
My husband’s unemployment gave us the feeling of being cast adrift in an unseaworthy vessel, subject to the whims of an ocean that could be calm and placid one day or teaming with storm waters and threatening to swamp us the next, depending upon whether a successful contact had been made on any given day, or whether the phone rang with the promise of a potential opportunity.
Some of the lessons learned seem so intuitive now it is hard to believe we had to learn them the hard way. The following come to mind as being the most compelling:
1) Contrary to common thought, once my husband actually became unemployed, more opportunities were presented to him. I feel the reason for this is that he was unable to sufficiently focus on the job search until it became his primary occupation. While he was still employed, his focus was really on his job. In a down turned job market, the onus is on the candidate to do the work to find a role. It is pretty difficult to conduct a thorough search as an employed executive.
2) Learning how to successfully network was a process that developed over time. We learned what now seems obvious: Networking doesn’t consist of calling people to see if they have a job for you. Once my husband realized that the successful way to network was by contacting people and offering reciprocal help, it was much easier for him to reach out. It felt less like he was asking a favor, allowing him to maintain his sense of dignity. In this way, he was able to refer contacts for roles for which he was not a direct fit, ultimately developing a great deal of good will.
3) Two heads are better than one. As far as my role was concerned in this whole process, it helped relieve some of the anxiety inherent in our situation to be an active participant in my husband’s search. Obviously, I was limited in how much I could help, but my contributions of composing cover letters, perfecting his résumé and checking online job sites for appropriate positions not only helped us cover more territory, but diffused some of the stress we were feeling.
4) Don’t let pride get in the way of successfully conducting your search. At the first networking group my husband attended, he felt very much like a fish out of water. His attitude was that a group of unemployed people really couldn’t help him much with his search. He was pleasantly surprised when he made contacts with people from his industry who led him to other contacts. The power of a good network is enormous. We will never forget that lesson.
Throughout all of the months of uncertainty and despite the stress, I found the whole job search process to be intriguing, and I frequently wondered what approach ultimately would pay off and prove to be the successful route to a new role for my husband. In the end, two terrific opportunities popped up roughly around the same time. One was through a direct link made by networking, and the other was a role posted on ExecuNet. Although it was difficult to walk away from an excellent opportunity, he ended up accepting the role which was offered first, rather than following both through to conclusion and potentially walking away from one and not be offered the other.
In closing, I have to add that as approaching all challenges one faces in life, it’s important to maintain both a sense of perspective and humor. Try to keep your life as close to “normal” as possible. Be flexible. We realized early on we had to be open to relocation, given the job market. Ultimately, change can be good – even unplanned, middle of life changes which are imposed upon you! Living with a “type A” unemployed person is not easy. But this too shall pass. Good luck in your searches and happy landing!
